nuremberg secrets
my mother has been my agent, she set up appointments with at least 20 people for me to meet and exchange stories for chilibread. the amount of chilibread she and her friends baked is astounding. i basically got off the plane, took a two-hour nap until my mom woke me up to start our audio-tour.
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she has established a community of collaborators for me to engage with. her role in this project is crucial as she is well known in her community. people trust her and thus it was easier for them to trust me, an outsider, an artist. most of my collaborators are of working and lower middle class background. contemporary art is not essential to their lives. nevertheless, i sensed a desire to communicate, to tell a story, to speak to someone about one's memories. i realized that the topic i asked about - the hauptmarkt and events relating to its history or purpose - was insignificant, like a topic in a casual conversation. often the narrators let themselves get carried away, recalling memories of war, far-away native countries, childhoods, and - lost pets.
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artist as listener, healer, therapist, counselor, adviser, victim (!) - most important though: artist as interpreter. people long for interpretations of their experience. risk: artist's interpretation not accepted by non-artists - precarious situation.
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most people invited us to their homes or their work place. my mom and i were guests, we were sometimes treated to lunch or dinner, and we tasted some amazing wines. others were surprised and confused by our visit, nervous about our intrusion.
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in a public art piece, trust is an essential component. from my own experience it is difficult to establish trust, it seems that inquiry, criticism, and doubt don't support the development of it. here is where my own predicament comes in: as an artist i feel the urge to migrate, not to get too comfortable, to challenge the notion of "home". trust, however, needs stability, a community. public art involved with its audience, needs a community. how far do i want to go? how much do i want to be a member of a community? if germany is one big, closed-off, inward looking community, then this is certainly a major reason for me not to feel comfortable there. perhaps this discomfort is the motivator i need to make art.
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nostalgia often derives from a lack of community - like the stories from nuremberg. when i'm not in germany i become nostalgic for it, when i'm there i see the reality of it - i sense my "non presence". maybe this is how to best describe freud's idea of unheimlich: the uncanny.
.
.
.
she has established a community of collaborators for me to engage with. her role in this project is crucial as she is well known in her community. people trust her and thus it was easier for them to trust me, an outsider, an artist. most of my collaborators are of working and lower middle class background. contemporary art is not essential to their lives. nevertheless, i sensed a desire to communicate, to tell a story, to speak to someone about one's memories. i realized that the topic i asked about - the hauptmarkt and events relating to its history or purpose - was insignificant, like a topic in a casual conversation. often the narrators let themselves get carried away, recalling memories of war, far-away native countries, childhoods, and - lost pets.
.
.
.
artist as listener, healer, therapist, counselor, adviser, victim (!) - most important though: artist as interpreter. people long for interpretations of their experience. risk: artist's interpretation not accepted by non-artists - precarious situation.
.
.
.
most people invited us to their homes or their work place. my mom and i were guests, we were sometimes treated to lunch or dinner, and we tasted some amazing wines. others were surprised and confused by our visit, nervous about our intrusion.
.
.
.
in a public art piece, trust is an essential component. from my own experience it is difficult to establish trust, it seems that inquiry, criticism, and doubt don't support the development of it. here is where my own predicament comes in: as an artist i feel the urge to migrate, not to get too comfortable, to challenge the notion of "home". trust, however, needs stability, a community. public art involved with its audience, needs a community. how far do i want to go? how much do i want to be a member of a community? if germany is one big, closed-off, inward looking community, then this is certainly a major reason for me not to feel comfortable there. perhaps this discomfort is the motivator i need to make art.
.
.
.
nostalgia often derives from a lack of community - like the stories from nuremberg. when i'm not in germany i become nostalgic for it, when i'm there i see the reality of it - i sense my "non presence". maybe this is how to best describe freud's idea of unheimlich: the uncanny.
brain wave II
my dad and my two brothers ca. 1969 - a dad with his two sons on the banks of the hudson near beacon ca. 2010
brain wave IV
my parents and i skating on the silverlake in nuernberg ca. 1966 - skaters at rockefeller center in ny ca. 2010
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